Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Sacrifices

A 7 yr old child does not care if her mother is tired from working all day because she got no sleep from writing half the night. All this child cares about is that they were supposed to make cookies together. So when she looks at me with those wide, hopeful eyes, what can I do? I get off my duff and roll out the cookie dough.

This is part of a mother's sacrifice. A parent's sacrifice. This is what we do; we put our wants and needs aside to give our children the kinds of experiences that build memories they can look back on fondly for their lifetime. We build legacies with cookie cutters and craft scissors. Our children recall these things so fondly when they are grown that they want to provide these experiences for their own children. This is what love means.

Love means you haul your tired bones out of your recliner, and help your daughter cut out heart cookies for the 4th of July because we love our country. (She said that.) Love means you look past the mess she's made doing it herself up to that point, and laugh with her while you finish the job and clean up. Love means you don't count the minutes until you can sit down again or gripe at her for the extra work she's made for you. Love means you come second.

Society today doesn't want us to see things this way. We're just as important as our kids. I agree, to a point. An emotionally or spiritually unhealthy mom is worse than useless to her kids. She's a detriment. But a mom focused on her own well being is also a detriment to her kids. She needs balance, and it's not hard to find. We don't need to kill ourselves to raise healthy, well adjusted kids. Really, it's easier to do when we take a little of the "perfect mommy" pressure off ourselves.

And, when you do, there's freshly made cookies to enjoy.

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